When I first met him to play, I had never played with a Dom. I'd taken turns playing switch with a sub friend of mine and I'd had an aggressive but not Dom (his words) boyfriend but no Dom. Even though I said I didn't want to be "on" all the time, because we were together for play, not a more serious relationship, I guess I still thought he'd just be big bad Dom most of the time I was with him, not ....well, not a real person.
Tonight I'm sitting in the living room, reading my book after doing dishes, across from Ginger's preteen son, who's visiting from out of state, with the Professor, my Master, sleeping on the couch, so he won't be too asleep to make dinner (with any luck.) Every ten minutes or so, he rolls over, pulls the pillows back over his head, snorks or coughs. The blanket I'm guessing was covering him up in the beginning, is mostly on the floor, with one corner still trapped between his legs. The blanket & sheet we use to cover the ratty old couch is also almost completely on the floor, and getting more on the floor everytime he rolls over. His shirt and pant legs are both riding up. Oh, and he just started snoring.
This isn't exactly what you think of when a sub or slave (I'm gonna use s-type from here on out, ok?) talks or writes about their big bad Dom(me) or Master/Mistress (I'm gonna use D-type from here on out for this one, mkay?) Or at least it isn't for me. For some reason, all I think about is a big dude in leather pants, no shirt, and a leather masks, not the gimp kind but the kind used to disguise your face but allow you full breathing and sight abilities. When I read things and someone talks about their D-type, it still seems like some scary distant stereotype of a person, not this person like I have, who I've seen make mistakes and be sorry for them, who i've seen be upset for stupid reasons or no reason at all, who I've seen be sad and grieving and hurt and vulnerable and even, gasp, cry. Who never uses his gruff Dom voice to derail my (perhaps unjustified) anger. Nope, instead, when I was trying to cry privately in the shower, he came in, got naked, said "Are you done crying yet? Because I'd like a shower before you use the hot water up" and took over my shower. It was too ridiculous to be mad after that, both of us standing there very unsexily naked. I don't imagine the D-types of all those s-types on fetlife snoring on the couch in such an undignified manner.
But here he is. And he's definitely my D-type. And seeing him in all those situations, or in this one, never makes me doubt it.