Thursday, April 13, 2006

New Set of Rules

So, Sir and I are trying to find a way to meet in the middle on alot of these issues. We really want to salvage our friendship and strengthen it. Sir needs me to get over him, or at least to a point where not having him doesn't hurt me so much. Frankly, I need it too. I still want Sir to be my spiritual and life guide, but Sir needs for me not to look to him to micromanage my every move I make. Sir likes to deal with problems by taking lots of time and space, so I want him to feel like he has that, especially since he also has lots to deal with already. On the other hand, I want to talk to him as much as possible and have him involved in my life and what I am doing and working on. So, this is what I came up with and Sir thought it was a good idea. I feel REALLY good right now. I think I can keep this up, at least for a few months until we can start acting like real friends.

  • E-mail Sir my day-to-day boring stuff. Blog lots about interesting things that I am thinking about, goals, hopes, things in the works.
  • Call anytime if there is an emergency or if Sir needs to talk about his gf/her illness. Otherwise: Sir, text before calling if he just wants to talk to make sure I'm not having a bad day when talking would hurt both of us; Ava, meditate for 15 minutes before calling with my expectations of Sir giving me something.
  • Ava will read books about breaking up and getting over, and also meditate on letting go/not grasping. Sir will talk about his relationship with Ava just as he would with anyone else, so that big things don't seem like such surprises and Ava can get used to this reality. If Ava can't deal with something, she will politely excuse herself from the conversation for a while.

I hope that us doing this will help to strengthen our friendship and ourselves.

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